Ready or Not

All it takes is one minute. 11:59 p.m. to 12 a.m and suddenly we're in a new year. Two Thousand and Eleven.

In two and 1/2 months I'll be 41 and I'm finding myself feeling the same dread I felt when I was nearing 31. The same "deer-in-the-headlights" frozen sensation wondering that if I turn back now I can make it back across the other side of 40 before the wall gets sealed-up.

It's not a fear of turning 41 because that I could care less about, it's the fear that has been growing inside of me for sometime now. The fear of "am I doing all I can to live a life I can be proud of?" Some days I can answer Yes and other days it's a resounding No. What will I look back and see when I'm 50? 60?

In two days I'll be starting a new photo contract assignment that is expected to be on-going and should be able to support me. For this I am giddy with happiness and relief and actually wish I'd of started on it by now, just to get the ball rolling. It's going to be very interesting and yet another adventure to include in my suitcase of memories.

"Black Plant" The Last Shadow Puppets s